Date: Tue, 06 May 2003 08:21:54 -0400 From: Parking Bowls Subject: BLAGUES-L: Why God never received tenure at a university in the US Date: Sat, 05 Jun 1999 08:25:55 CEST From: Henri Brandenburg A joke originating from the backpage of a Dutch paper Henri Why God never received tenure at a university in the US: He only had one major publication. It had no references. It was not published in a refereed journal. There is doubt that he wrote it himself. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since? The scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. He never applied to the ethics board for permission to use human subjects. When one experiment went awry, he tried covering it up by drowning the subjects. When subjects did not behave as he expected, he deleted them from the sample. He rarely came to class, and just told students to read the book. He had his son teach class. He expelled his first two students for learning. Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed the test. His office hours were infrequent and held at a mountaintop.