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Date: Fri, 21 Mar 2003 10:30:33 -0500
From: Small Town
Subject: BLAGUES-L: The lawyers and the judge in a small town

Date: Mon, 09 Dec 2002 17:48:07 -0500
From: Jean-Claude Gagnon
Subject: Lawyers - Don't you love em?

In a trial, a small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness 
to the stand, a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her and 
asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you 
since you were a young boy.  And frankly, you've been a big 
disappointment to me.  You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate 
people and talk about them behind their backs.  You think you're a 
rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will 
amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned.  Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across 
the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was 
a youngster, too.  He's lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem.  The 
man can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice 
is one of the worst in the entire state.  Not to mention he cheated on 
his wife with three different women.  Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died!

At this point, the judge brought the courtroom to silence, called both 
counselors to the bench, and in a very quiet voice said, "If either of 
you bastards asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!"

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