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Date: Mon, 4 Feb 2002 17:31:03 GMT
From: Heavy Bulb
Subject: BLAGUES-L: Trip to Rome

Date: Wed, 04 Nov 1998 08:45:42 +0000
From: Simon Lewis
From: Joe from the Laffatorium

A man walked in to Joe's Barber Shop for his regular haircut.  As he
snips away, Joe asks "What's up?"

The man proceeds to explain he's taking a vacation to Rome.

"ROME?!" Joe says, "Why would you want to go there? It's a crowded dirty
city full of Italians! You'd be crazy to go to Rome! So how ya getting

"We're taking TWA," the man replies.

"TWA?!" yells Joe. "They're a terrible airline. Their planes are old,
their flight attendants are ugly and they're always late! So where you
staying in Rome?"

The man says "We'll be at the downtown International Marriot."

"That DUMP?!" says Joe. "That's the worst hotel in the city! The rooms
are small, the service is surly and slow and they're overpriced! So
whatcha doing when you get there?"

The man says "We're going to go see the Vatican and hope to see the

"HA! That's rich!" laughs Joe. "You and a million other people trying to
see him. He'll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on THIS trip.
You're going to need it!"

A month later, the man comes in for his regular haircut. Joe says,
"Well, how did that trip to Rome turn out? Betcha TWA gave you the worst
flight of your life!"

"No, quite the opposite" explained the man. "Not only were we on time in
one of their brand new planes, but it was full and they bumped us up to
first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a beautiful 28
year old flight attendant who waited on me hand and foot!"

"Hmmm," Joe says, "Well, I bet the hotel was just like I described."

"No, quite the opposite! They'd just finished a $25 million remodeling.
It's the finest hotel in Rome, now. They were overbooked, so they
apologized and gave us the Presidential suite for no extra charge!"

"Well," Joe mumbles, "I KNOW you didn't get to see the Pope!"

"Actually, we were quite lucky. As we toured the Vatican, a Swiss guard
tapped me on the shoulder and explained the Pope likes to personally
meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into this
private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me. Sure enough,
after 5 minutes the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand. I
knelt down as he spoke a few words to me."

Impressed, Joe asks, "Tell me, please! What'd he say?"

"Oh, not much really. Just "Where'd you get that awful haircut?"

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