Accueil > BLAGUES-L > Archives 1999 >

Date: Fri, 25 Jun 1999 11:36:02 -0400 (EDT)
From: Jemdat Nasr
Subject: BLAGUES-L: Dubious Crimes and Other Anecdotes

Date: Thu, 24 Jul 1997 08:17:19 -0400
From: Darrell M Hamilton

 Dubious Crimes and Other Anecdotes
In Crown Point, Indiana, police have re-opened the case of a man who died
from 32 hammer blows to his head. The cause of death had been ruled a
suicide, in spite of the County coroner's opinion that a man simply could
not remain conscious long enough to hit himself in the head 32 times... 
25, 26... wait, how many was that?...
Police in La Crosse, Wisconsin, arrested a suspect who accosted a woman
near an automatic teller machine and menaced her with a knife.  The man
told police that he wasn't trying to rob her-- he only wanted to sell her
the knife....

After robbing restaurant manager Janice Head at knifepoint and taking her
purse, her assailant was so smitten that he called to ask her out. Police
arrested the man when he arrived for their date... 
The London Times has reported some serious breaches of health regulations
in British hospitals, including the finding of dead cockroaches in the
food served at the Royal Free Hospital in Lancashire. The catering manager
of the hospital apologized for the problem but explained that the insects
posed no health risks, as long as they were cooked to the correct

When a British schoolboy was unable to remove a vase that was stuck on his
head, he was rushed to the hospital on a city bus.  According to reports,
in an attempt to make the boy look more normal to the other passengers,
his mother placed his school cap on top of the vase....
Albert Collins, a 66-year-old apartment manager in Kansas City, went to
the apartment of a tenant to complain about the noise.  Collins reported
to police that he told the tenant he had had "an earful" of the excess
noise.  Replying that he would "fix that", the angry tenant seized Collins
by the hair and bit off part of his ear... there goes the damage
deposit... (Judy's Question:  Is this guy Mike Tyson's trainer?) 

Police in San Mateo, California, arrested a man for stealing a 400 lb. 
safe from a restaurant less than a block from his home.  Alert officers
simply followed the gouge-marks the safe left in the concrete as he
dragged it home...
A Toronto gas station attendant had no trouble identifying a robber for
police, even though the man had worn a pair of women's panties over his
head as a disguise. The thief, who later admitted that his mind was
clouded by intoxicants, had stuck his face through one of the leg-holes so
he could see...
And after the same man had held up a Michigan bank for the third time, the
Detroit Free Press reports that the teller told police, "Each time he's
better dressed."

In Ottawa, Canada, a woman calling herself Lady Rhoda claims to have X-ray
vision.  She was recently arrested and charged with reckless driving when
she struck a pedestrian during a demonstration of driving while

Until 175 years ago, anyone convicted of attempting suicide in Britain was
hanged... well at least they won't try that again...

A teenager who deposited a candy wrapper in an automatic teller machine
found his account credited with 500 thousand dollars, according to a
report from Auckland, New Zealand. The boy withdrew about $750 before
confessing to a school teacher... what we want to know is: what kind of
candy wrapper works best?

Law enforcement officers in Oldham, England, had no trouble identifying
Roy Phillips as the shoplifter they were looking for.  The suspect was
wearing a yellow shirt, yellow pants, and a yellow tie.  Additionally,
every item he had taken from the store was also yellow, including Scotch
eggs, jellies, mustard, cheese, socks, and three pair of yellow

In a sad note, the National Council of Pork Producers announced that it
will no longer sponsor its annual beauty pageant. It seems that nobody
really wants to be National Pork Queen...
Francis Karnes, a 39-year-old man in Sacramento, California, was charged
with reckless endangerment after he pulled a gun and shot his lawnmower
when it wouldn't start... and of course, you heard about those awful
chainsaw massacres in Texas...

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